First of all, let me say that “FAT” is a loaded word. It means different things
to different people and has a pile of emotions behind those 3 little letters. I
have respectfully put it in “quotations” because of this.
I’m not emotionally attached to the word, so I want to be careful with its use.
At the same time, I want to share my experience. I have never been fat in my
life, but I’m pretty sure I’m in the category right now. It’s true that I am 9.75
months pregnant as I write this, and you could argue that this is why I think
I am “fat”. But I’m pretty sure I qualify. You see, I’ve gained about 60 pounds.
The baby is currently more than 8lbs (BIG BABY!), so how about those other 5o
So, for perspective, we’ll go to these facts and leave the “F” word out of it.
When I got pregnant, I weighed 128 pounds. As of last Friday, I weighed
187 lbs. That’s a BIG difference! I have even grown out of some of my maternity
clothes! These are just facts. I’ll tell you what I’ve learned…
I’ve learned that it is MUCH harder to move with the extra weight. I had this
concept in my head before now, but until you actually experience it, it is just
a concept. I understand now why overweight people have a hard time getting
started with working out. It is HARD to move! You just have so much extra
bulk and gravity makes that stuff heavy and uncomfortable. I get it now. If
you decide you’d like to run, you will most likely hurt your joints. You’ve got
to start slow and steady, which can be frustrating. Especially with body weight
I still do my tricep dips, but they are HARD! I have SUPER strong triceps! I can no
longer do a reasonable push up- meaning I cannot go all the way down and
come back up. Lunges and squats are more difficult as well. Don’t even get
me started on pull ups. Those are challenging to do even if you weigh a buckOfive!
My muscles are very strong because I kept up the working out as I was gaining weight,
but I can see how fast that could go downhill. And I can definitely see how it
would be frustrating to get started.
I also realize from this experience that it is more important to me to be strong
than it is for me to be thin. I value my strength and agility very highly. I love
that I can still do my 15 lb bicep curls & overhead presses. 2 months ago a trainer
in the gym asked me if he could get me lighter weights. The 15’s ARE lighter
weights, and I thought it was a stupid thing for him to say, but I just said “No thanks”.
I love that I can still teach my classes. It is harder, like I said, but a lot of that has
to do with my belly being ginormous and hard to get around than all the other weight.
My traps have overtaken my neck because of all the boob and belly weight. I
don’t love the way that looks. And my face is chubby. I don’t love that either.
My ass was big before, but it has its own moons now. There is cellulite on my
legs and I’ve never seen that before. I don’t love that. Oh, and my inner thighs
touch. Now, that’s just weird. I can’t imagine ever getting used to that sensation.
Definitely do NOT love that!
But what I do love is the chance to experience these changes and this perspective.
I guess for me I think it’s temporary so it doesn’t bother me. I don’t think it has to
be permanent for anyone, but of course people who weigh more than they want to
weigh for most of their lives don’t see any options. I see options!! I see the power I
have to change it if I want to! Why?
Because I know how this happened! I ate a LOT!! I ate healthy food, I ate shitty food. I ate
pizza all over nyc because I’m moving to jersey and I don’t like the pizza there so
for some reason I stocked up! In my first trimester, I was so nauseous that all I could eat
was bread. And I had to keep eating it in order to be NOT nauseous. I don’t even eat much
bread in ‘real life’. I don’t like what this country has done with our wheat supply ( All GMO- but
that’s another blog…). Basically, I ate a LOT of food!! And I knew what would happen.
And it happened. And I am still strong and still ‘fit’ and still agile. You can workout all
you want and still be “FAT”. Sorry, but it’s the truth. It’s what you eat as well.
I am certain that when this baby comes out (I am guessing it will be in the next few days)
that I will still be fat. And a week later, I will still be fat. But, I’ll tell you what. I am just not
attached to this fatness, so I’ll be letting it go within a few months of the baby’s arrival.
I love the lessons I learned. I love knowing that I value my strength more than being thin.
I love having had the experience of being a substantial woman! I am LARGE and IN CHARGE!
And I know what to do to let it go. There are ALWAYS options. If you don’t think there are
options, then reply to this post. Reply anyway. I want to know what you think.
In any case, I’ll be letting this extra stuff go in the near future and you are welcome to join me…
Love & Encouragement to YOU!
Your “FAT” Fitness Coach,